Thursday, March 12, 2020

Are You Suffering From Imposter Syndrome Heres How To Tell

Are You Suffering From Imposter Syndrome Heres How To Tell Sheryl Sandberg has an impressive resume COO of Facebook, founder of LeanIn.org, former Googler, former chief of staff to the U.S. Secretary of the Treasury. She is one of the most successful women in modern society, and yet she has famously gone on record as saying that she often has felt one day everyone will realize that she isnt worthy of her accomplishments and achievements, and that shes gotten lucky to have achieved all that she has.You might read that and scoff, thinking it sounds absolutely ridiculous for someone who is such a high achiever to have anxiety and to doubt themselves that way but the truth is, almost all of us do at some time or aelendher.These feelings have been dubbed imposter syndrome or imposter phenomenon and youve probably been a victim of it at one point or aleidher.What is Imposter Syndrome?Signs of imposter syndromeFeeling like yure a fraud youre pretending to know what youre doing at work.Lac k of self-confidence in your positionDoubts about your abilities and achievmentsNegative self-talk Im not good enough, or Im not worthyDwelling on mistakes and/or assuming no one makes the same mistakes as you (or at all)A lack of self-confidence, anxiety, doubts about your thoughts, abilities, achievements and accomplishments, negative self-talk, feelings of inadequacy, dwelling on past mistakes and not feeling good enoughthese are all signs and symptoms of imposter syndrome. And these thoughts and feelings plague all people, successful people, men and women of all ages, races, and orientations. This pervasive negativity can grow if you dont get it under control, though.I have, too. I married young and had my son by 25. Having a family took center stage, and I welchesnt as focused on my career. I felt for a long time like I hadnt found my passion.Now, all of that has changed. I have been focused and intentional about what I want out of life, especially in my job and professional e xperience. In the process, I became hyper-focused on all the things I worried I should already have or have been doing while I was a twenty-somethingmy mistakes, my experience, and my lack of self-confidence that had me feeling like a fraud at times.Some regret is normal, but other thoughts are harder to drown outlike maybe youre not good enough to be doing that thing youre doing or trying to do and maybe everything youve accomplished so far can be a result of plain luck. In times of doubt, and in listening to that voice, it certainly seems easier to put your dreams on holdor even retire them altogether due to an overwhelming feeling of inadequacy.Imposter phenomenon feeds on your deepest fears, and hears your doubts that you tuck away from others. If you dont know the signs, it can negatively impact your professional and personal life. It can keep you from connection with other professional people in your field and growing your strengths. It can drive a wedge between you and the su ccessful people you emulate and how to be one day. It can make you feel like a complete and total fraud.But you dont have to let it win. You can fight back.Here are five lessons I learned about imposter syndrome and how I moved past the negative self-talk1. Failing doesnt mean youre a failure.In fact, failing is normal. Many equate failure with not being up to par they believe that they should just quit while theyre aheadthis is a major aspect of impostor syndrome. The truth is, there is no such thing as an overnight success. Thomas Edison was famous for having said that he never failed, he just found 10,000 ways that didnt work. Failing will teach you far more in the process than you imagined possible, including the value of hard work, resilience, and resolve. It can also sometimes lead you to the path you were truly meant to land on.2. Dont compare yourself to others.Have you ever stalked someones Instagram and been envious of their seemingly perfect life, as told by the bright, c olorful pictures that present only a snippet of their reality? Well, the same goes for someones job or their LinkedIn profile. The truth is, you only know as much as you see on the surface. You arent privy to all the details about the hard work it took to get to where they are and all the sacrifices theyve made. No two journeys are the sameAs Theodore Roosevelt said, comparison is the thief of joy.Dont beat yourself up and assume you should be anywhere other than where you are. Focus your energy on your goals and what you CAN accomplish, and let the negativity go.3. The definition of success is subjective.Before I knew better about ignoring the rule of comparison, I began unconsciously chasing the success I had seen someone else achieve one day I took a step back and asked myself what I was hoping to find. I was chasing a dream that wasnt even mine, and sadly I didnt even realize it for quite some time. I had gotten so caught up in the idea of succeeding that I had lost the definiti on of what success really meant to me. This definition is personal, and only you can decide what it means to you and your happinessmake sure what youre chasing after is yours and yours alone, not someone elses ideal.4. Those afflicted are Ambitious, high achievers.The fact that you are on Fairygodboss right now shows a dedication to your professional development. If you didnt care about your career or about succeeding, you wouldnt have any fears or doubts, and that is just as scary. Mediocrity has no place in your life, and that can be terrifying. You might be a work in progress, but arent we all? Of course, there are things we can all improve on. There are weaknesses that we can strengthen. There are strengths that can be even stronger. There are skills we can learn and get better at. But this is an all too common thought. Doubting yourself is not so much a syndrome as it is a totally normal part of experiencing success.5. Fear can be great fuel.If harnessed and utilized properly, fear can motivate us and push us out of our comfort zones. Great things happen outside of comfort zonesuse that energy to make positive changes in your lifeIf youre afraid to try something for fear of failure or rejection, try and see what happens. My motto is simple, and has served me incredibly well Whats the worst that can happen? If you fail or get rejected, you wont be in any different position than if you hadnt tried. And you can always try again. There truly is nothing holding you back but yourself. We all have our moments of doubt, but the key is not letting them paralyze us and stunt our professional growth. If we let that happen, then weve truly lost.Impostor syndrome doesnt have to be the death of your career or the final nail in your professional coffin. Many people suffer from these negative thoughts, you just need to learn how to compartmentalize and push past the thoughts and feelings that are bringing you down and making you doubt your abilities, achievements, and ac complishments. you need to focus on the positives.You need to focus on being the successful woman that you are. And by making it a point to learn these four powerful lessons, you can make sure the negative self-talk doesnt win out.Quick FAQsHow do you know if you have imposter syndrome?You can tell if youre coping with imposter syndrome if you find yourself constantly doubting your accomplishments, despite your obvious successes. For example, if you dont feel worthy of your job promotion, even though you made clear progress in the last year with quantifiable successes under your belt, you might be dealing with imposter syndrome.How do you beat imposter syndrome?You may never actually beat imposter syndrome, and thats OK Realizing that almost everyone else is contending with the same feelings can help you feel less alone and help you move past fear. Acknowledge what youre feeling, and then keep doing what youre doing (its a cliche, but faking it until you make it really is a thing).H ow do you deal with impostor syndrome?To deal with imposter syndrome, you should first acknowledge that you have it. Then, you can work on self-confidence and awareness. Resources like Fairygodbosss article on how to get over imposter syndrome are also helpful.Is imposter syndrome in the DSM?Impostor phenomenon is not recognized in the DSM, though the classification system does recognize low self-esteem and sense of failure as two associated symptoms of depression.--Karen Schneider works for bareMinerals in weltumspannend Packaging + Creative Services and has worked in a variety of industries over the span of her career, including digital media, fashion apparel, and wine spirits. She contributes writing to The Muse and Career Contessa and her career advice has been featured on Business Insider and Harvard Business Review. She is obsessed with learning, life, and career/self-improvement.

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